Monday, March 23, 2015

You Determine The Outcome of Your Life

I am going to share with you seven words that are your guide to living a flourishing life. I suggest that you write these seven words as a NOTE TO SELF. Commit these words to memory, tattoo them on your arm if you have to. Do whatever you have to do to commit to memory these seven words to memory.

Are you ready?

"I determine the outcome of my life." Repeat them with me. "I determine the outcome of my life. I determine the outcome of my life."

That’s right. You determine the outcome of your life by the choices you make, by the actions you take, by the decisions and actions you are afraid to make and to take. You determine the outcome of your life.

Your concept of yourself determines the world in which you live. Your concept of yourself determines your reactions and responses to life. How you define yourself – I am ill … I am broke …I am successful – shapes your consciousness. Your concept of yourself is what you accept as true. Your outward world – what you own, how you present yourself – is a manifestation of your inward thought. How we react to our inward expression -- to people, to situations -- reveals where we are psychologically – emotionally and cognitively. And where we are psychologically, determines where we are outwardly.

To be successful in business, a company needs to know where it is heading and what it is trying to accomplish. That’s why many businesses create a vision statement: what the company would like to achieve or accomplish; and a mission statement: how they intend to get there.

To be successful in life, we need to take this same approach in shaping the direction of our personal lives. Your personal vision statement should focus on the potential inherent in the your future, what you intend to be. And while a vision statement might contain references as to how you intend to make that future a reality, the “how” is actually part of your mission statement, a summary of values and goals that clearly outline who you are and what you want to do.

Personal improvement requires insight and courage. When we don't have a vision for the future, we will not necessarily fail, but more likely, we will merely survive rather than thrive, than flourish. Without a vision for the future we stand less of a chance of growing, of expanding, and improving because we have no clear idea of what direction or form this growth, expansion, or improvement should take.

Every action you take is influenced by your attitude towards it. And when your actions and thoughts are not in sync, your life experiences are imbalanced. Just like our bodies thrive in homeostasis --- balance – so do our thoughts and our emotions.

Whatever it is you want to achieve, in your person life, in your professional life, set your intention to achieve it. Make this a habit that serves you.

Set your vision, your imagination, on what it is you want. Imagination is our greatest gift. “Imagination is more important than knowledge.” (Einstein) Imagination fuels our thoughts; action makes our thoughts soar. Imagination is the medium through which we create our world. So I ask you: What do you imagine for yourself?

Once you determine want it is you want, devise a course of action, and then take step forward each day, and none back.

Set goals. Goals keep us focused on our message and mission, keep us disciplined in our actions, and help us achieve what we want in life. Goals help us to flourish.

Who is supporting you in your pursuit of your goals? Share your vision with a trusted friend or colleague. Ask them to keep you accountable to the task.

Focus on hope. Let go of “doom and gloom” thinking. Don’t fear change. Change is an invaluable opportunity to learn and to grow. Neville Goddard wrote: “All transformation begins with an intense, burning desire to be transformed.” Direct your thinking. Be open to change. Let go of fearful thinking and attitudes.

Learn to manage your emotions before they manage you. If you want a better outcome, you have to take clear-sighted action. Don’t become a victim of complacency. Remember: You lose 100% of the opportunities you do not take. And if you risk nothing, you risk everything.

You have the power to change your life. You can evolve or devolve -- the choice is yours. So, step out of your comfort zone. Do one thing differently each day. Fall in love with your life. Passion fuels joyful living.

Lastly, make it a practice each day, before you get out of bed, to set your intention for the day. This practice leads to more purposeful living.

You can live fearlessly. Choose to do so.

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Managing Caregiver Stress Through Resilience

On Tuesday, January 13, I had the honor and pleasure to present, in conjunction with Janet Edmundson of JME Insights, a Free Webinar on Managing Caregiver Stress Through Resilience. Many caregivers are considered to be "hidden patients," for they fail to notice the signs of stress in their own lives. With their attention so focused on the care and needs of their loved one, their own potentially harmful symptoms go unnoticed. The warning signs of stress can attack so subtly and lead to an increase in physical and mental health deterioration.

The opportunity to hear a recording of this free webinar is now available. Simply click here and you'll be able to access the program via Go To Meeting.  Of course, if you have any questions, please do contact me.

Have a joyful day everyone. And remember to live a flourishing life.


To learn more about how you can live a flourishing life, please visit my web site,

Sunday, November 30, 2014

Managing Strong Feelings

"Never cease trying to be the best that you can be. That's under your control. If you get too engrossed and involved and concerned in regard to the things in which you have no control, it will adversely affect the things over which you have control." - From John Wooden on True Success (View video)

The frustration or anger that can well inside us from situations that are not only out of our control, but have nothing to do with us, chips away at our peace of mind and releases stress hormones which, left unattended, can lead to health-related problems.

The capacity to manage strong feeling, emotions, and impulses involves being able to:
  • take action without being impulsive and responding out of emotion
  • put emotions to the side when clear thinking and action are required
  • use thinking as a way of managing one’s emotions
When we allow ourselves to get worked up, particularly over the small stuff, we are needlessly causing our bodies to go into fight-or-flight mode.

To learn more how to management circumstances that are out of your control, visit Live A Flourishing Life.

Have a joyful day everyone. And remember to live a flourishing life.

Friday, July 18, 2014

Calming the Mind

"Calmness of mind," James Allen wrote, "is one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom. It is the result of long and patient effort in self-control." So how can we do this in the midst of a hectic workday? Often we stress about things we cannot change: the economy, the weather, our commute to work. Recognizing the difference between what we can and cannot change can help us live more peaceful and productive lives.

Managing stress is a pathway to healthy living, and mindful breathing is the conveyance that helps the mind and the body to relax and focus.

Mindful breathing is a simple practice and one with multiple benefits: increase focus, lower heart rates, and the metabolizing of stress hormones, especially cortisol, which is harmful to our health. It takes as little as ten conscious breaths, less than sixty seconds, to ease oneself out of a stressful state. And mindful breathing can be done anywhere — in the office, the car, the elevator, the privacy of a bathroom stall.

When you feel anxious, overwhelmed, or stressed, try this simple mindful breathing exercise:
  • Breathe in, filling your diaphragm with your breath. Focus solely on your breath as it fills inside you, shutting out all other thoughts. 
  • Then breathe out. 
  • Next, begin to silently count your breaths as they arrive. Notice the brief periods of quiet as one breath ends and before the next one begins.
  • Repeat this process until you’ve counted 10 breaths — not allowing any other thoughts to distract you. 

 In just sixty second, the approximate time is takes to do this simple exercise, you will feel greater peace accompanied by increased steadiness and balance of mind.

By choosing mindful breathing instead of coursing through a self-perpetuating cycle of stress, you begin to create and reinforce the habit of managing your stress rather than your stress controlling you.

Have a joyful day everyone. And remember to live a flourishing life.

To learn more about how you can live a flourishing life, please visit my web site,

Friday, May 30, 2014

Changing Habitual Behavior

The greatest weapon in our arsenal is our ability to choose one thought over another. But our choices must be wise. So how can you tell if you are making bad choices?

If  you find yourself in the  "different set of circumstance, different situation, same old crappy outcome" trap, then you are ensnared by habits that do not serve you.

To begin to make better choices it is necessary to go back and examine and reflect on past events in order to find the strengths you have within. Many psychologists today preach that it's not really until adulthood that people begin to surmount the difficulties of childhood and to rebuild their lives. But let’s set the record straight. That concept goes back more than 2300 years . . . back to Aristotle.

Aristotle wrote that there are two times in our lives when our character is shaped. The first is when we are children. At this time our habits and attitudes are shaped by our parents and our early teachers who taught us the best they knew how based on what they learned. These early attitudes and habit formations were central to our character development. However, sometimes those lessons were negative.

To adapt habits that make you flourish, you must learn how to manage and maintain balance in your life. To begin this process, you need to look at your past experiences and be willing to take small steps to change the patterns of behavior or attitudes that keep you in the cycle of dysfunction.

Changing habitual behavior is a process. Be patient and be compassionate with yourself. Each of us creates our own journey of releasing bad habits and adopting good habits through conscious choice. Embrace those choices; embrace the changes. They are the catalysts that will improve your life.